Saturday, July 11, 2009

Alternate Nursery Rhymes 2

Hickory, dickory, dock,
The mouse ran up the clock.

The clock struck one,

Which angered the mouse greatly. The mouse then whipped out a bazooka and proceeded to blow away the clock's gears and chiming mechanisms until all that was left was a smoking pile of wood.


Hot cross buns!

Hot cross buns!

One a penny, two a penny,

And the only way that delicious hot cross buns could be sold 2 for a penny is if the Hot Cross Buns Company has a monopoly, which is a clear violation of Federal Anti-Trust laws.


It's raining, it's pouring;

The old man is snoring.

Bumped his head

And he went to bed

Which was very poor judgment on his part because he slipped into a coma due to his head injury. He wasn't discovered until 3 days later when his worried daughter came by the house because no one had heard from him in a while and he wasn't answering his phone. Now the old man is on life support at St. Mark's and his kids can't decide whether or not to pull the plug.

2 comments:

  1. Well done sir. I also love that on the ads by Google to the right, there was an ad for Zombie fan dating service. Only on your blog!

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  2. I always wondered about how the family member gets into the house to find their loved one/eldery neighbor? locksmith, steel toed shoes and kicking in the door, axe, a spare key?

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