Tuesday, July 7, 2009

March Madness and Other Such Occurrences

Today's DMT will address the issue of sports, what month they are played in, and what degree of "madness" or other affliction may or may not affect the players, coaches, cheerleaders, officials, and fans. While NCAA basketball's "March Madness" is by far the most well known case, other sports/months have similar, if less publicized, occurrences.

For example, on the second month of every year, "February Fever" sweeps through the state of Alaska. During "February Fever", Alaskans enjoy a month of high energy, non-stop thrills, extreme ice fishing. Businesses, schools, and even libraries all close so that "Feverish Fans" can go out and watch the action. The "February Fever" Classic Ice Fishing Tournament has been a tradition in Alaska since its creation in 1912. And while the FFCIFT is completely legit and legal, there is a large amount of money that changes hands due to underground gambling during the month. The name "February Fever" is somewhat ironic considering that winter in Alaska is extremely cold.

Another sports/month phenomenon is the "December Depression" which occurs in the town of Fleek, North Dakota. The "December Depression" is similar to "March Madness" and "February Fever", but in reverse. Fleek High, the only high school in the small town, is the not-so-proud owner of the most consecutive losing seasons in high school basketball history. The Fleek High Cheetahs have not had a winning season since 1934. Each December, as the Cheetahs begin to pile up more and more losses, the town again loses hope that the streak will end, and falls into the "December Depression". Suicides in Fleek go up 11% during the "December Depression", as do burglaries, DUI arrests, and jay walking all because the local basketball team can't win more than they lose. Those who can afford it just leave town for the whole month rather stick around and face the "December Depression."


  1. I couldn't find Fleek, ND on google map so it must be a very small town. If suicides go up 11%, that means there are usually 9 suicides a month but in December it goes up to 10. How can a small town survive 109 suicides a year? Something else is going on besides bad basketball.

  2. And no mention of "September Silliness?"

    The people of Butte City, Idaho would be disappointed that you neglected to mention their annual hide and seek national championships. The defending champion is a fantastic blend of speed and elusiveness.